Self Love

Love, Mindfulness, Self Love / 16.03.2021

Walking was the only thing that helped. I would walk for miles around town, not knowing where I was going or when I would be home, but I never thought of how I would get home until a Sunday in March two years ago, but I did. I made it home. “Where are you going?” Damon asked as I grabbed my coat from the entrance closet. My choices were the lightweight rain coat, Mom’s heavy Alaska coat that she purchased for their trip to Alaska hence the name, a circus logo fleece jacket, one of the few black jackets, or the handful...

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Education, Love, Self Love / 09.09.2020

**The following experience contains racist and sexist language, abusive situations and other triggering points. Please read only if you have healthy support to handle emotions that might come up.** I was having the most normal of conversations with the produce, as one “normally” does when visiting Sprouts. Well, hello eggplants. You all seem to be looking extra lovely today and shiny, perfect for Bhaghan Bhurta or Eggplant Parmesan. Shall we go Desi or Italian tonight?  Oh, Cilantro – stunning as always. Pakistani it is! As I was mentally calculating roti ingredients in the pantry at home, a voice boomed behind me. “Didn’t you go to...

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Love, Mindfulness, Self Love / 16.03.2020

Sister Sledge belted out “We Are Family” as the five of us cruised towards our local Pieology. It was Saturday, March 14th, pi day and the restaurant chain had a special: buy one pizza at regular price and get one for $3.14. Our fridge and pantry were fairly empty because at 4 am we were scheduled to depart for Maui visiting the Hawaiian Islands, for the first time, as an early graduation gift for our twin sons. They had requested this trip as freshmen so it was a few years in the making. The Universe had other plans called COVID-19. Dusk is...

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Belief, Family, Self Love, Women / 23.09.2019

One of the most joyous days of my life, our daughter’s bat mitzvah, concluded with family and friends helping us to our home from the reception hall: carrying in presents and trays of leftovers, making room for the centerpieces that were still to be gifted to Sissy’s friends, and a relative calling me fat. For upwards of 18 months, plans were underway. Honestly, right after our boys’ b’nai mitzvah, three years earlier, the preparations had begun. Mom and Dad, my in-laws, were gracious enough to store the boys’ centerpieces: a glitter-fest, feather-filled, Cirque du Soleil romp of color and splash. Our...

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Family, Growing Up, Self Love / 18.04.2019

This college entrance scandal has been weighing heavy on my heart and soul; even though I have not committed any fraud or criminal act, how complicit have I been in being part of a society and culture that values success, sometimes no matter the cost. As parents we want the best for our children: a better life; the best of health; access to the best education; and may I add failure. Yes, failure: the act of not succeeding at something, possibly coming in second or not getting on the scoreboard at all. Honestly, our family knows little to nothing about sports....

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Belief, Humanity, Self Love / 24.01.2019

As far back as I can recall I wanted to be old. Daadi called me an “old soul”, someone who had been here before, experiencing life for a second time around. She was a devout Muslim, but growing up in India surrounded by Hindus and Sikhs, their cultural norms seeped into her Soul, widening her spiritual being to encompass more than one view of the Spirit. Even though she rarely discussed it, I sense she was a firm believer in reincarnation, the rebirth of the Soul into a new body. “Samita, we need another player for taash,” one of the elders...

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Family, Love, Self Love, Women / 02.01.2019

I wonder what saves a partnership from demise? Is it the baby that a couple thinks will remind them of why they got together in the first place? Is it therapy: that elusive relationship with a total stranger – if done well – you pour heart and soul into only to receive nods and no specific direction as to what choice to make, except to go further inward? Or is it New Orleans? In the case of my marriage, if you guessed a combination of therapy and NOLA you’re correct. Almost two years ago, Damon and I decided that it was...

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Growing Up, Immigrant, Self Love, Women / 26.04.2018

Having moved from Bellwood, Illinois to Rialto, a suburb in Southern California, most people would be elated: sunshine almost all year round, palm trees, and a mere one hour drive to some of the most famous places in our country. But at the age of 12, having left what I knew of home behind – including Tanessa, my childhood best friend – I was devastated and like most soon-to-be teenagers spent my days in an emotional abyss because “no one understands me, no one has ever gone through what I am” and a general woe-is-me attitude. One day to Umme’s delight,...

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Education, Mindfulness, Self Love, Women / 05.04.2018

Having lived into my forties (44 and-a-half next month), I can humbly say that I am one of the worst employees an organization can hire. Thankfully, for all the Fortune 500 companies out there, I’m blissfully content and blessed being a self-proclaimed co-CEO of the Needelman Household, blogging, and volunteering. The line wrapped around the block, winding from the entrance of the building, which was too far to see from my vantage point, and encompassed a few city blocks. By the time I stood in line, holding my “resume”, teacher recommendation letters, report card from graduation, and list of awards received,...

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Growing Up, Love, Self Love / 29.03.2018

For decades I looked outward for signs of love, security, nurturing, belonging – home. A year ago my world didn’t fall apart but I did. This past year has gifted me countless opportunities to seek healing, therapy, healthy support, and tested my faith like never before. Broken, not knowing where to turn, and lost in darkness, the Light, which gave hope to my soul was found – within. The holy space - where Awe, Love, and Light reside - shone stronger and stronger, a beacon guiding me back to where God rests, where He never left – the seat of...

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